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Bog Standard

Toilet humor has long been the comfort zone for daily publications, and writers stay alert regarding memorable lavatory incidents and historic moments, especially in relation to football. Readers were entertained to find out that an online journalist a well-known presenter owns a West Bromwich Albion-inspired toilet in his house. Reflect for a moment regarding the Barnsley supporter who understood the bathroom rather too directly, and was rescued from the vacant Barnsley ground following dozing off in the toilet during halftime of a 2015 loss versus the Cod Army. “He had no shoes on and misplaced his cellphone and his headwear,” explained a representative from Barnsley fire services. And who can forget at the pinnacle of his career with Manchester City, the controversial forward visited a nearby college to access the restrooms back in 2012. “He left his Bentley parked outside, then entered and inquired the location of the toilets, subsequently he entered the faculty room,” a pupil informed the Manchester Evening News. “Subsequently he wandered through the school like he owned the place.”

The Restroom Quitting

Tuesday represents 25 years since Kevin Keegan stepped down as England manager following a short conversation in a toilet cubicle with FA director David Davies deep within Wembley Stadium, subsequent to the memorable 1-0 setback against Germany in 2000 – England’s final match at the historic stadium. As Davies remembers in his diary, his confidential FA records, he stepped into the wet struggling national team changing area right after the game, discovering David Beckham crying and Tony Adams “fired up”, both of them pleading for the official to reason with Keegan. After Dietmar Hamann's set-piece, Keegan had trudged down the tunnel with a thousand-yard stare, and Davies found him slumped – just as he was at Anfield in 1996 – within the changing area's edge, muttering: “I’m off. I’m not for this.” Stopping Keegan, Davies worked frantically to salvage the situation.

“Where on earth could we find for a private conversation?” remembered Davies. “The tunnel? Full of TV journalists. The locker room? Packed with upset players. The shower area? I was unable to have a crucial talk with an England manager as players dived into the water. Just a single choice remained. The lavatory booths. A dramatic moment in England’s long football history happened in the old toilets of a stadium facing demolition. The coming demolition was almost tangible. Pulling Kevin into a stall, I secured the door behind us. We stood there, facing each other. ‘You can’t change my mind,’ Kevin said. ‘I'm leaving. I'm not capable. I'll inform the media that I'm not adequate. I can’t motivate the players. I can't extract the additional effort from these athletes that's required.’”

The Aftermath

And so, Keegan resigned, later admitting that he had found his period as Three Lions boss “empty”. The two-time Ballon d’Or winner added: “I had difficulty passing the hours. I began working with the visually impaired team, the hearing-impaired team, supporting the female team. It's an extremely challenging position.” The English game has progressed significantly in the quarter of a century since. Regardless of improvement or decline, those stadium lavatories and those iconic towers have long disappeared, although a German now works in the technical area Keegan previously used. Thomas Tuchel’s side are among the favourites for the upcoming Geopolitics World Cup: Three Lions supporters, appreciate this period. This exact remembrance from a low point in English football serves as a recall that situations weren't always this good.

Current Reports

Follow Luke McLaughlin at 8pm UK time for women's football cup news concerning Arsenal's match against Lyon.

Daily Quotation

“There we stood in a long row, in just our underwear. We represented Europe's top officials, premier athletes, inspirations, adults, parents, strong personalities with strong principles … however all remained silent. We barely looked at each other, our eyes shifted somewhat anxiously as we were summoned forward in pairs. There Collina inspected us completely with an ice-cold gaze. Mute and attentive” – previous global referee Jonas Eriksson discloses the embarrassing processes referees were previously subjected to by previous European football refereeing head Pierluigi Collina.

Football Daily Letters

“What does a name matter? There’s a poem by Dr Seuss called ‘Too Many Daves’. Has Blackpool experienced Excessive Steves? Steve Bruce, along with aides Steve Agnew and Steve Clemence have been removed from their positions. Is this the termination of the Steve fascination? Not completely! Steve Banks and Steve Dobbie continue to take care of the first team. Full Steve ahead!” – John Myles

“Since you've opened the budget and awarded some merch, I've opted to write and share a brief observation. Postecoglou mentions he initiated altercations in the schoolyard with youngsters he knew would beat him up. This masochistic tendency must account for his decision to join Nottingham Forest. As an enduring Tottenham follower I will always be grateful for the second-season trophy however the sole second-year prize I envision him securing along the Trent, should he survive that period, is the second tier and that would be a significant battle {under the present owner” – Stewart McGuinness.|